Sugery

Well I would say that it has been forever since I last blogged. Things have been pretty hectic around here. Not to mention I forgot what my sign in information was. That was a challenge. Tried the many different e-mail addresses between Brandon and I to figure out which one it was.. Sheesh.

This post will be a long one. Sorry in advance.

Anyway, I have a herniated disc in my back. This happened back in April 2006. Back then the Dr. had given me a few different types of shots to help with the pain and make it manageable. The shots worked with the back pain, but with the herniation it was pinching my sciatic nerve. This caused major pain down my left leg. Along with the pain their was weakness and it felt like my leg and foot were constantly under immense amounts of pressure.

The first shot is a steroid epidural. For anyone that has had children those epidural needles are friggin huge. Well this one was no different. But they had to be extremely careful on how they injected me. They were going right into the spinal column but not far enough to hit the spinal chord (which could in turn cause paralysis.) So they entered the needle then took an x-ray, then they would tap the needle further, take another x-ray this went on for about 20 mins until they were in the position they needed to be in to inject the steroid.

The other shot that they administered to me went directly into my sciatica. That hurt like hell. I felt like it was on fire while they were electrocuting me. My whole body jerked. The Dr. mentioned that if the second shot didn't help I was looking at a possible surgery. At this time I told them it wasn't an option as I was getting married in 2 months. That shot worked for about a month. I was able to talk my Dr. into giving that second shot (the one in my Sciatica) to me again. Finally after having 3 different shots it seemed to help and I was extremely grateful.

Back in 2007 the shots began to ware off and I went back in to see what else they could do. The Dr. sent me for an MRI. Well it turns out that I couldn't do the MRI because I had stents put into my kidneys because they were severely infected. I was admitted into the hospital with Toxic shock (different story for a different day.)

After the kidney episode I didn't want anything to do with hospitals or Dr's so I never went back to get the MRI. I dealt with the pain which at that point was just another part of my life.

However, just recently I started to have major pains in my back and the constant pressure in my leg became more pronounced and my muscles started to spasm. I made an appointment to go see the Dr. A week before my appointment I went to work. Driving the car was so painful by the time I got to work I was in tears. (I have established earlier how much of an ass my boss is) When I got there he looked at me and asked if I was fine. I said I wasn't then he walked off without another word unless it was to come and tell me to do something. By 10 AM I could hardly move, so I called Brandon who was in between shifts at work and he had to come and get me. My boss wasn't to happy about being left alone at work and actually having to do something. Brandon took me to the ER and the Nurse Practitioner that was in charge looked at me said it was muscle spasms and told me to try to get into the Dr. sooner. She also said she would give me some prescriptions (which would not have lasted through the weekend) and that I could go home. I am not one that likes to take medication, but with the pain I was in I knew that 3 days of Rx's weren't going to do much. Not to mention some kind of relief right then would have been nice I wanted to be knocked out I didn't want to feel anything. I was begging Brandon to do something so that I wouldn't hurt. He was at a loss on what to do when my mom showed up. She was able to get the nurse to finally give me some morphine to help with the pain. She wasn't able to get my Dr. to see me any sooner than Thursday so she pulled some strings and got me right into see a pain specialist.

The pain specialist tried to give me one of the epidural shots but my vertebrae are bone on bone and he wasn't able to get the needle in. He then told me he was going to give me a nerve block (the one in my Sciatica). By this time I was like I don't give a damn which shot you give me I will deal with being electrocuted if this pain will just go away. He gave me the shot (which hasn't helped) and ordered a MRI.

I went to my original Dr. after the MRI and it showed that the herniation has become so severe it is crushing my Sciatica. Which explains the extreme pressure in my leg. The Dr. then told me he wanted to schedule surgery within 1-2 weeks. I got really sick at having to think about going through surgery. I scheduled an appointment 3 weeks later which was the 1st week in May. I told him I wanted to wait and not have surgery. He was not happy and was adamant because of the damage that is being done to my leg. He told me that the damage my be irreversible the longer I wait. My leg is drooping and does not have the strength that my right one has. It goes between numbness and spasms and feeling like it is on fire while at the same time it feels like the pressure is enough to break the bones. The nerve is creating the muscle weakness which is causing the spasms which are worse than having a charlie horse and last for at least 10 mins at a time. Causing the muscles to constantly be sore and weak.

Two weeks ago while I was at work my back started to spasm really bad while I was walking into my office. I barely made it to my chair to sit down before I couldn't move again. I told my boss I needed to go home as soon as I could move. I then scheduled an appointment with a different Dr. At this time I figured that the only thing I could do was having the surgery my one Dr. was pressuring me into.

I was so scared to go to the other Dr. to hear what he had to say. In the span of a month my back and leg became really bad I thought I would have to have surgery. It is a very scary thought thinking about any operation let alone one on my back... the surgery also wouldn't give me any guarantees that it would fix the problem. I could also have issues when I get older that will most likely cause more surgery and the kicker... this surgery, as with any other surgery on your back as the potential to leave me paralyzed.

I made Brandon go with me to the other Dr. I didn't want to hear the news on my own, because I figured I was so worn down I would probably loose it if the other Dr. agreed and I needed surgery right away. The Dr. thinks at this time I need surgery, but he wouldn't suggest it. I was kind of confused. He said surgery would possibly be the quickest way to ease the pain, but not an option he wants me to go with. He told me to deal with the shots and other medications for as long as possible. Told me to try to loose some weight which would consist of basically just dieting as he doesn't think exercising will help with my back just aggravate it more if I were to handle the pain of it at all. He told me that I was young enough and it could possibly heal itself because the body does wonderous things.

It was a great relief to finally have the pressure of needing surgery off my mind. Now its just having to deal with the spasms and pain which are becoming even more a part of my life. I can not wait until this is over and I don't have the pain..... that is something that I look forward to. I don't remember what it was like before this, living with out it.